Controlling Yourself

We talk a lot about different skills, qualities, and attributes that help you differentiate yourself.

Out of all them, self-control has to be the most important one.

It is the ability to choose, for yourself, what is ultimately best for you.

Self-control is the foundation for self-improvement. I cannot see how someone can grow without it.

It takes self-control to build healthy habits, to be in a committed relationship, to excel in your job.

Mastering self-control is essential to achieving your dreams.

John Dryden says, “First we make our habits, then our habits make us.”

Habits that possess self-control are the habits that we want to “make us.”

It does not take self control to eat out everyday and skip your workouts but it does take self-control to hit your workout hard and make a healthy meal at home.

Those are the habits that we want to “make us.”

Sometimes it is easier to take the self out of self-control.

For example, at the beginning of the year, I noticed that my screen time was up to 4-5 hours a day.

While that is below the average (8 hours a day) I did not want to continue that habit.

I tried for weeks and weeks to simply avoid my phone and only managed to bring the average down about 30 minutes a week. That was still not enough.

Instead of continuing down this road, I decided to take the self out of self-control.

I implemented screen time limits on all my non-essential apps and gave the password to override the limits to my lovely wife (who, by the way, hates when I am on my phone).

The very next week, my screen time cut in half.

I do not think that this should be the answer for everything your life. Exercising your own self-control is extremely valuable.

But for the bad habits that are extra hard to kick - try taking the self out of self-control.

Go out and master self control. Go out and make a difference.